Over the last couple of weeks, we have been talking with Anna and Taylor about love languages. One week, we watched this video called "What Makes You Feel Loved" by Cynthia Tobias, a woman I have heard speak at UPC several times. We each made a list like she suggests in the short video.
The next week, we each took these surveys:
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/children/
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/couples/
It was interesting to see that Taylor scored high on words of affirmation, and Anna scored about the same on words of affirmation, physical touch and quality time. Jason was high on quality time while my two primary languages scores were acts of service and words of affirmation. Jason and I both scored about the same on physical touch (but the score was lower than some of the others). What this made me realize is that this language is not always the first way we express or receive love with one another. I remember at the retreat with Tina last year that I expressed that I was concerned about all that would be required of us through the weekend. Quite frankly, my underlying question was "Could I sustain that amount of engagement and of showing up?" It felt a bit to me like asking a non-runner to gear up to run an ultra marathon without much practice building up to it.
These activities that we explored on love languages reminded me that intimacy is a language that I need to grow in and I need to learn to practice with more fluency. Jason and I continue to talk about how we can carve time out for each other and we continue to struggle to make that happen each day. But, I know that it's so important and that I want to be modeling this for our children. I am a beginner in this and am taking some baby steps in this language acquisition.
And, I just wanted the two of you to know that I am grateful we share this common language with you.....
The next week, we each took these surveys:
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/children/
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/couples/
It was interesting to see that Taylor scored high on words of affirmation, and Anna scored about the same on words of affirmation, physical touch and quality time. Jason was high on quality time while my two primary languages scores were acts of service and words of affirmation. Jason and I both scored about the same on physical touch (but the score was lower than some of the others). What this made me realize is that this language is not always the first way we express or receive love with one another. I remember at the retreat with Tina last year that I expressed that I was concerned about all that would be required of us through the weekend. Quite frankly, my underlying question was "Could I sustain that amount of engagement and of showing up?" It felt a bit to me like asking a non-runner to gear up to run an ultra marathon without much practice building up to it.
These activities that we explored on love languages reminded me that intimacy is a language that I need to grow in and I need to learn to practice with more fluency. Jason and I continue to talk about how we can carve time out for each other and we continue to struggle to make that happen each day. But, I know that it's so important and that I want to be modeling this for our children. I am a beginner in this and am taking some baby steps in this language acquisition.
And, I just wanted the two of you to know that I am grateful we share this common language with you.....
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